Is it worth it?

When we ask if something is worth it, usually we consider if a particular product or benefit justifies the trouble we went through to get it. For example, if one were to buy something we would generally consider the going rate and if it was fair. We might even research the value and get the opinions of others of what they paid and how long the product lasted. Then we would weigh the options and then make our decision whether or not said item would be purchased.

Seldom do we consider in our debate about the value of the product the actual effort that was given. For example, if one were buying a t-shirt for $10, the person might justify the price because it was the right size, had an attractive logo, it was well-sewn, or maybe even the right color. Another person might not justfiy the price because of the brand, the thin weight, or they saw a similar shirt for $8. Neither likely would consider if the t-shirt was worth the half-hour, hour, or longer that they spent shuffling papers, flipping burgers, or stocking shelves to earn that $10. It's much easier to place the worth of something on the opinions of others and trends in a particular society.

The same can be said about a woman expecting a baby. She struggles with swollen ankles, back aches, nausea, food aversions, sleep-deprivation, and fatigue, only to have others tell her that birthing the baby is going to be so much worse! The woman hears horror stories about prolonged labors, difficult deliveries, tragedies, and pain, and then casually is told, "But it's so worth it."

The woman, having never experienced a pregnancy, has to take the word of others, especially when she is in the middle of a contraction! She has to push aside the incredible task for the promise of the new baby that will change her life. And when the baby is finally born, and the mother takes that child in her arms, within minutes she knows, and has perhaps forgotten a measure of the pain she experienced just moments before, and knows that it was, indeed, *worth it.*

If applied to the trials and hardships in our lives, we tend to weigh the stress we are feeling as a result and wonder if the blessing, which may come immediately or be delayed for several years, could be justified by the pain that we are experiencing. Perhaps we might have the perspective that we can learn and grow. Or perhaps we might seek out the opinions of others to get comisseration to the unfairness of the trial weighed against what we think we deserved. Seldom do we consider the spiritual effort we must put forth, and nearly always declare that the blessing is overpriced for the amount of effort expended.

As with any trial that could be mentioned, the death of a child, to a parent is devestating. Nothing can quite be compared. The heartaches and dissapointments in life that are often experienced in other ways can be similar, but never quite the same. Grief is unique to an individual, even among others who have also experienced the same kind of tragedy or hardship.

One might ask themselves if the effort given to raise the child, teaching them, feeding them, caring for their illnesses, waiting in doctor's offices, paying their expenses, and instilling values, was worth it in exchange for only the 19 (or 3, or 12) years they got to spend with that child. After all, they did not get to see the payoff of that child gaining success, marrying, or fulfilling the dreams that were partly the child's, and a measure of the unfulfilled dreams of the parent. It is even considered the trend in society to have the child pick out the casket of the parent, not the other way around.

Seldom do we consider in our debate when going through any kind of grief, is the tender mercies that are given away freely, so often that sometimes they might go unnoticed. They are in the kindnesses of others. They are in the memories. They are in the laughter. They are in the peace in the turmoil. They are in the sunflowers at the side of the road.

When considering the above as sufficient payment for the amount of despair that is felt, might one also weigh the cost of an older Brother who loved us enough to not only pay the debt of our sins, but in so doing also bought us access to a lifetime of healing and pain-relief? Are we worth it? Have we taken advantage of the tremendous price that was paid for our souls? Are we getting what we deserve?

Someday a mother will see her daughter again, share in the feelings, laugh with her about the memories, and feel honored that she was able to be her mother for the brief 19 years that she was on earth. And then this mother will take that child in her arms, and within seconds will know, and perhaps she will have forgotten a measure of the pain she experienced just moments before, and will know that it was, indeed...

worth it.