Perhaps the easiest way for the forces of good to communicate with me, is through dreams. I have always been blessed with the most vivid and compelling dreams. The past month has been no exception.
I had a dream a couple nights ago that my father (who's been deceased for 2 years) was driving a car really, really, really fast. I was hanging onto the windshield while he was driving, feeling the wind and the pressure around me. I was telling him that I was having a hard time hanging on and he needed to slow down.
He said, "Let go."
I said, "I can't let go. I'll die!"
He said, "You won't die. I'll catch you. Let go."
I said, "I can't let go." Then I woke up.
Friends and relatives have said that the dream was a metaphor. My father being a metaphor for my Heavenly Father and letting go as a metaphor for letting go of the grief.
I agree with them, but I keep asking: How do I let go?
People keep telling me that it's individual for everyone and the process is never the same. I'm taking vitamins every day to keep my resistance up (and not just to germs). I'm reading my scriptures, saying my prayers, having family home evening every week, getting out of the house, staying busy, etc. Perhaps it's been ingrained in my brain throughout my life that letting go, is a fancy way of giving up.
'Letting Go' seems like such an easy thing. It involves NOT doing something. How hard can that be, really? When our family went to visit Carlsbad Caverns a few years ago, we decided to walk down to the bottom. It was all downhill. How hard can it be to hike downhill? I learned, and rather quickly I might add, that going downhill is hard on the muscles too because of the resistance to gravity. In the brief times when we had to actually climb, it was a welcome relief.
I can only conclude that letting go is a process, hopefully building my spiritual muscles along the journey. And when I reach my destination, I know I will find, not darkness, but comfort. You may find me resting occasionally, rubbing my callused feet along the way, but you will never see me giving up.
I know letting go only means giving up when you give up on God.
I'm having a hard time posting comments. I tried to post one here and it erased the whole thing. Grrr
ReplyDeleteI've heard the saying, "Let go and let God." I've wondered about this saying too as I've had trials and struggles in my life. I recall a story I heard in church:
ReplyDeleteA man is hanging from a tree branch over the side of a cliff. He calls and calls for help. Finally, a voice from heaven says,
"I'm here. I can help you."
"Thank you! Thank you!"
"Do you trust me?"
"Yes, Lord. I trust you! I really do!"
"Then let go of the branch and I will catch you."
"Let go of the branch! I can't do that. I'll fall! I'll die!"
"You say you trust me. I am God. I will catch you. Let go of the branch."
PAUSE
"Is there anyone else up there????"
This story was told as a joke in Church, but I've never forgotten it. It's so hard to let go of the branch, figuratively speaking and trust God will catch me, hold me in His arms and take care of me and whatever concerns me. I try so hard but sometimes I reach a point where there is nothing more I can do and I feel helpless. I realize I must turn to God and trust Him. He has never let me fall, but still, I go through this process of trying to exercise faith and trust Him every time I desperately call upon Him. It's hard to let go and trust God, but it's the very thing I need to do!
That's interesting Joanne. The story was a branch. My dream was a car. Chills.
ReplyDelete